Buzz Bites — 3/3/2009: DAVID ARCHULETA HURTS PEOPLE

+ David Archuleta was all, ‘I HATE MY CAREER’ and said a lot of nasty stuff in his new video update while on tour.  Just kidding — he was his usual PAINFULLY sweet self.  No really — it hurts.  (Neon Limelight)

+ Hold onto your skin-lightening pills, kidz.  Michael Jackson is poised to perform a series of shows at London’s 02 Arena this summer.  Would you go across the pond to see him??? (People)

+HOLY CRAP KEVIN FEDERLINE IS FAT!  Britney is TOTALLY lolzing.   (Pink Is The New Blog)

+ Those crazy kids Fall Out Boy just launched their own version of Oregon Trail, an old Mac computer game NONE of YOU crazy kids will remember.  And if you do, you’re probably going to see Michael Jackson at 02 this summer. (Friends or Enemies)

+ Our girl Lauren Conrad is writing a series of books “loosely” based on her experience as a reality television star.  I’m so confused.  (Remote Control)

+ Everyone just needs to leave Miley and her boobs alone already!!  She could put on a SNUGGIE and go jogging — as long as she’s with her hot boyfriend, I really don’t care. (Us Magazine)

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